finite empathy: Zelda: A Link to the Past... with a Portal Gun!!!

Zelda: A Link to the Past... with a Portal Gun!!! - Dorkly Bits

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Hokay so... here's the earth... it's chilling, damn that is a sweet earth you might say, round! alright... ruling out the ice capes melting, meteors be coming crash into us (phew), the ozone layer leaving (FU!), and the sun exploding (shit shit), we're definitely going to blow ourselves up (phew). Hokay so, basically we've got china, france, india, israel, pakistan, russia, the UK, and US, with nukes, we've got about twenty-six hunred more than anybody else (God bless America), whatever. Hanyway (w00t), one day, we decides those chinese sons of bitches are going down, so, we launch a nuke at china. While it's on the way china's like, "shit shit who the fuck is shooting us?" "Oh well fire missiles" Then france is like "shit guys, we got the cigarettes missiles they are coming fire our shit" "but I am le tired" "well, have a nap, THEN FIRE ZE MISSILES!" meanwhile australia is down there like "WTF mates" india, israel, and pakistan launch their shit (whatev)... so now we've got missiles flying everywhere, passing each other (Yo! whatup?) russia's like "AHHH MOTHERLAND!" then england's like, "bout that time eh chaps?" "... righto" so now the US is like "fuck we're dum..b asses" canada's like "what's going on eh?" australia's still like "WTF?" mars is laughing at us and some huge meteor is like "well fuck that" soh... now we've got nuclear winter, everyone's dead except australia, and they're still like "WTF?" but they'll be dead soon, fucking kangaroos. But, assuming we don't blow ourselves up, us Californians just have to work on California breaking off from the united states (bypass doom), to go hang with hawaii, alaska can come too (hey guys, w0rd!). THE END!

finite empathy

Zelda: A Link to the Past... with a Portal Gun!!! - Dorkly Bits

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